Regardless of the fact I'm a woman, I still find this incredibly funny.

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A Chemical Analysis

Element: Woman
Symbol: WO

Discoverer: Adam

Atomic Weight: Accepted as 118 but is known to vary from 100 - 160 lbs.

Occurrence: Surplus quantities in all urban areas.

Physical Properties:
1) Surface usually covered in a painted film.
2) Boils at nothing, freezes without reason.
3) Melts if given proper treatment.
4) Bitter if used incorrectly.
5) Found in various states, ranging from virgin metal to common ore.

Chemical Properties:
1) Possesses great affinity for gold, silver, platinum and other precious metals.
2) Able to absorb great quantities of expensive substances.
3) May explode spontaneously if left with a MALE.
4) Insoluble in liquids but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.
5) Yields to pressure applied to correct points.

Uses:
1) Highly ornamental especially in sports cars.
2) Most powerful money-reducing agent known to man.
3) Can be a great aid in relaxation.

Tests:
1) Pure specimen turns a rosy tint if discovered in natural state.
2) Turns green if placed beside a better specimen.

Only known weakness:
1) PMS, it can piss a woman off better than anyone can.

Caution:
1) Highly dangerous except in experienced hands.
2) Illegal to possess more than one except in certain areas.

lol.. that was great. Never heard.

Liked this one especially:

Able to absorb great quantities of expensive substances.

Rofl! From Virgin metal to common Ore. great. just great!

Awesome.

Very cool Isillinde . Don't suppose you know if there's one of those out there about men do you? I'd be interested to see that.

that was good, the only problem I found with it was here:



It's not illegal, if you don't get caught.

There are two versions I've found for men, though the first is a bit difficult to read, so I'll try to get it typed up later. (I'm on campus now, and just might get in trouble for having that photo on the screen. haha)

http://www.onefunsite.com/man.shtml

http://www.jestsandjokes.com/show.php3?joke=79

Some points are very true, other redundant, others just bitter. lmao. (I have a feeling WO was the original joke, and these are reaction jokes.) Somebody needs to write a better, more objective one. ... Guuuuuuys?

Hm... I'll have to see if I can find the version I had. It wasn't anything like those two, and several years old to boot. The Wo one is virtually unchanged, but the male joke was short in comparison... and pretty brutal to boot. Still was funny though.

THATS COOL I GUESS.