Actually, I didn't even notice whether or not Reeves was acting well, because honestly, the story carries about 60% of the movie, the special effects carries a good 30%, and the acting is maybe 10%. I LOVED this story, seriously. Well, most of it. The end had a tiny little twinge of Hokey in it (specifically the part that involved "the sacrifice"), but that Hokeyness was nicely counterbalanced by the irony right after. Action is balanced by interjections of black humour. And the special effects are just tasty, tasty icing on that sweet movie cake.

On the Koroleva Scale of Movie Awesomness, 10 being totally rad, and 1 being wicked gay, I rate Constantine an 8.5.

::SPOILER::

The ripping out of the lung cancer is when I checked out. Up till that point I liked the movie. Other than that and being tinge of the slow side, it wasn't bad. By the way, I stopped caring about Reeves's acting a while ago. I know he's gonna suck.

Man! That part was really cool! Satan can be such a bitch sometimes...

But are you saying you disliked the ending?

I liked it more than I thought I would. I'm glad I've never read the comics.

There were a few "DUDE! WHOA" moments from Keanu, but he was alright for most of it. He doesn't actually suck at acting, there are millions of worse actors. I'm glad he at least has some feeling for his range. Do not confuse what I'm saying for him being a good actor, however.

I liked the whole lung cancer part of the story, including it getting ripped out just so he's fucked and stuck on earth.

Good move insofar as it definitely makes you think.

Only thing that confused me was Gabriel. Was she a chick or not? Whose side is she on? Man...Gabriel was messed up.

Didn't make me think at all, actually. Not about "OMG WHAT IF THAT'S REAL" anyway. Hah.


Gabriel was awesome. That actress just.. goddamn, she was good.

Keanu Reeves wasn't always a bad actor...

"This is a dude who, 700 years ago, totally ravaged China, and who we were told, 2 hours ago, totally ravaged Ashman's Sporting Goods."

Well, maybe he was kinda bad in the Bill and Ted movies, but it was an entertaining bad.

Yeah, angels are supposed to be androgynous, they don't have genders, so they're usually represented as a combination between the two. Also, I thought it was hilarious that Satan cured his cancer. Humourously Ironic.

I thought the movie was amazingly awesome. I was pleasantly surprised by Keanu. If you had told me that he would do as good a job as he did, I'd have laughed in your face, and told all my friends. Sure, he was subpar, but for Keanu, awesome.

My only qualm was the killing of the sidekick.



Spoilers, bitch.

As someone already mentioned, angels and demons can't be classified as being a particular sex, and according to most, uh, 'mythology'(?) they don't have any sexual organs.

Gabriel herself wasn't really on either side. See, God and Lucifer have a wager going, to see basically how humanity will turn out. No direct influence, just whispers in the dark. Lucifer and God both have sons, remember. This part I'm making up, because it makes sense. Jesus finds a way to get into Earth, and for a number of years, he does what he feels is right, and dies, and goes back to Heaven. The reason this worked is that Jesus and God got along. Lucifer and his son...uh.. I can't remember his name, didn't get along.

In Hell's version of Corinthians, it was written that the son wanted to forge his own kingdom of fire and blood.

There's a conversation that transpires between Constantine and Gabriel that goes somewhat like this:

Gabriel: Your ego is astounding.
John: Gabriel. Figures. And the wicked shall inherit the Earth.
Gabriel: Are you judging me now, John?
John: Betrayal? Murder? Genocide? Call me (something, I think he says Provincal)
Gabriel: I'm only seeking to inspire mankind to all that was intended.
John: By handing Earth over to the Son of the Devil? Help me here.
Gabriel: You're handed...this precious gift, right? Each one of you, granted redemption from the creator. Murders, rapists, and molestors. All of you. You just have to repent. And God takes you into His bosom. In all the worlds, in all the universe, no other creature can make such a boast, save Man. It's not fair. If sweet sweet God loves you so, then I'll make you worthy of His love. I've been watching you for a long time. It's only in the face of horror that you really find your noble self. And you can be so noble. So, I'll bring you pain. I'll bring you horror. So that you may rise above it. So that those of you who survive this Reign of Hell on Earth will be worthy of God's love.
John: Gabriel, you're insane.
Gabriel: The road to salvation begins tonight. Right now.

The son of the Devil needs the help of an Angel to come into the world, as well as the blood of Christ, which is stained on the spear. She wants to release him for reasons she states. Lucifer and God both don't want that. When Lucifer sees Gabriel, he says "This world is mine, in time." He's pretty confident that he's going to win the wager against God and he doesn't want his own son messing it up. And, yeah, God takes the aura off of Gabriel, and Lucifer destroys her wings, and throws his son back into Hell.

I also found the way that Lucifer looked at his son and Gabriel was kind of Romeo and Juliet -esque.

No, it just seemed lame. Very, very lame.

This made me laugh... isn't that all of his movies!!